When getting married, it’s a known fact
that you are not just getting married to your partner but also to his or her family
including extended family members. It gets difficult at times when you have annoying
in-laws who find fault in everything you do. Having difficulties with your
in-laws doesn’t mean you’re in an unhealthy relationship, what matters is how
you handle these challenges.
1) First you must realize that your in-laws
are different people with their own unique culture which might be different
from yours.
2) Treat your in-laws with respect.
Respect is not always about age; treat them the way you would want to be treated.
If you treat them badly, be sure to get the same in return.
3) Never put your spouse in a situation where he
or she has to choose between you and a relative. If you do so, you're putting
your spouse in a nearly impossible bind. Instead, try to understand the bond
your spouse has with each member of his or her family.
4) Figure out the boundaries that you’d
like to set with your in-laws and set them e.g. you and your partner should be
able to set boundaries as to how often a family member can visit and how long they
can stay to avoid conflicts or limit your in-laws taking over your kitchen as
if it’s theirs.
5) Never go behind your spouse's back
when you deal with in-laws. And don't tolerate it if your spouse does.
6) Always communicate your thought to
your partner either good or bad. It is best they know how you feel about a
particular in-law.
7) If your partner refuses to stand up
for you and simply tells you to try to work it out, then stand up for yourself
or limit contact with the in-law.
Your in-laws are important to your
spouse, and they’re part of your life. It’s up to both of you to find a way to
make time with extended family as enjoyable as possible.
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